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The Sound of Silence

Updated: Mar 3, 2023

I've had the house to myself this week for the first time in about a year. That may not sound like a big deal to some of you, but for me it's HUGE! You see, my husband and I both work from home so there is always someone at my house. Literally, always. The TV is normally on all day long as background noise (a habit we both have) and even though he's never asked me to, I put pressure on myself to "logout" at 5pm to make dinner and spend time with my family.

I love being alone. As an introvert, it's how I recharge. It's something that is so important to me, which is funny because in my younger years I hated silence and equated being alone with being lonely. Now that I'm older and wiser, I realize that isn't true and those crazy ideas I had were mostly born out of insecurity and immaturity.

Before my husband left for his work trip this week, I had my alone-time all planned out in my head. I was going to wake up early every morning, drink my hot tea, go for my walk, meditate, get dressed and spend the morning working on my book. I would break for lunch, work on other projects until late afternoon, and then I'd spend my evenings working on the book. I had one evening planned with girl friends coming over for dinner and wine, and one evening with my son, but the rest of the nights I would spend curating my notary-life-story into words of wisdom for you to enjoy.

Here's the thing about plans....they require you to be dedicated to their execution. Ask me how many mornings I've walked or how many pages I've written. For that matter, ask me how many days I've woken up to my alarm. The answer: zero. I started to really beat myself up today about not following "the plan" for the week. Then I remembered several of the Building Authentic Relationships (BAR) calls I've hosted where I've spoken about the art of being kinder to yourself and using positive words instead of negative words when your brain starts to be a jerk. We also spoke about the true meaning of "introversion" and how it exists on a spectrum, and isn't a measure of how shy you are (or are not), but rather how you recharge your energy.

Reliving these calls brought me so much relief, and (to me anyway) was proof that all the BAR call material we discuss really works when implemented. Before studying these topics for the call, I would have beaten myself up for days and made myself feel guilty for being "unproductive," but I've learned that part of being productive is having the energy to execute. Sometimes this chick just needs time and space to do nothing to recharge my energy and that is self-care.

Next week, we will begin a BAR call series on what it means to be vulnerable in business. I invite all Notary Business Builders to join me on Wednesday (3/8) morning at 8am pacific/10am central/11am eastern as we discuss this very important topic. You can find a link to the call in your Tomm app/events.

If you're not an NBB member you can check this amazing group out here:

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Jennifer your honesty and vulnerability speak to many of us, but your article lets us know we can reset. I have a training project that I have been working on for 3 months. And I have put time on my calendar to work on the project and everything seems to "happen" that it still sits unfinished. But I know I have a lot of mental space that still needs to be cleared to move to the next chapter. Thank you again for this article. This weekend will be used to meditate and move!

Replying to

Jacqueline! I'm so happy this resonated with you. It can be so difficult to set our intentions to rest when all our brains think is "we have to do more!" :)

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